At the Cognitive Behavior Therapy Center of Silicon Valley, we offer cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) for children with School Anxiety and School Refusal. Our counseling approach with children with school anxiety is practical, goal-oriented, compassionate, and scientifically-based while focusing on your child’s individual needs. If your child is experiencing anxiety about going to school or refusing to go to school, you can learn more about social anxiety and our treatment approach below.

What is School Anxiety/School Refusal in Children?

Some children experience persistent and excessive anxiety that interferes with their academic, behavioral, emotional, and social development. If the idea of returning to school or starting a new school brings out severe anxiety symptoms in your child, then he/she may have an anxiety disorder.

As a result of anxiety, children may refuse to go to school or may have problems staying in school. Your child may regularly complain about feeling sick on school days or ask to stay home from school with minor physical complaints, such as stomachaches or headaches that are not related to a physical illness. Your child may repeatedly visit the school nurse. If you allow your child to stay home, the symptoms quickly disappear, only to reappear the next morning. Common physical symptoms include headaches, stomachaches, nausea, or diarrhea. But tantrums, inflexibility, separation anxiety, avoidance, and defiance may show up too.

Starting school, moving, and other stressful life events may trigger anxiety and your child may refuse to go to school. Anxiety-based school refusal affects 2 to 5 percent of school-age children. It commonly takes place between the ages of five and six and between ten and eleven, and at times of transition, such as entering middle and high school.

Symptoms of School Anxiety/School Refusal

• Being reluctant or refusing to attend school most days.
• Tantrums, crying, physical complaints, clinginess and other signs of emotional distress around going to school.
• Negative comments about school or negative beliefs about abilities at school.
• Fears that “something bad” will happen while at school and separated from parents.
• Excessive shyness around or avoidance of unfamiliar people and situations.

Cognitive Behavioral Model of School Anxiety in Children

Stressful events or transitions may trigger your child’s anxiety about school, but this is not always the case. According to the CBT model, school anxiety is maintained by your child’s exaggerated beliefs about the dangerousness of being alone at school, his/her beliefs that they will not be able to cope with their fear, and avoidance or safety behaviors that prevent new learning. For example, your child may be fearful of being alone at school due to fears about safety (e.g. fears of being kidnapped, fears that parents will be in an accident). Your child may employ “safety behaviors” such as avoiding school, calling parents throughout the day, or coming home sick, that relieve his/her anxiety in the short-term, but prevent your child from learning to cope with everyday anxiety and uncertainties. These mistaken beliefs and ineffective safety behaviors will be the focus of treatment.

Cognitive Behavior Therapy for Children with School Anxiety

CBT focuses on helping your child to identify the feelings and thoughts that maintain his/her fears and worries about school, to learn to cope with anxiety in new ways, and to use his/her new coping strategies to face the fear of school. You and your child will learn about common anxiety symptoms and how avoiding school actually makes the fear worse. Your child’s therapist will teach your child new ways to respond to worries and fears about school, such as positive self-talk, “brave” statements, and calming strategies. You will also learn how to support your child in practicing these skills in the real world and how to allow your child room to use his/her own resources to manage anxiety-provoking situations. Your child will then face his/her fears through exposure therapy, gradually increasing school attendance and decreasing safety behaviors.

Common Goals of Cognitive Behavior Therapy with Children with School Anxiety

• Return to normal school attendance.
• Develop healthy and realistic beliefs and expectations about school.
• Reduce avoidance and safety behaviors that maintain the fear of school.
• Increase comfort and independence in being in public environments without parents.

Getting Help for Your Child with School Anxiety/School Refusal

School anxiety is often stressful for parents and may be difficult to understand. It is helpful to be open-minded in listening to his/her fears. Help your child understand that anxiety and uncertainty is a normal part of growing up and remind your child that he/she is safe and will be protected. It may be helpful to talk about fears you overcame as a child. After talking with your child it may be time to get some professional help.

How to Get Help for Child Anxiety and OCD in San Jose/Los Gatos

The Cognitive Behavior Therapy Center of Silicon Valley (San Jose/Los Gatos) specializes in anxiety and OCD therapy and counseling for children. Click to send an email for more information on how we can help your child overcome his/her anxiety-related problems.

Silicon Valley and Sacramento Valley Communities We Serve

Cognitive Behavior Therapy Center of Silicon Valley offers evidence-based therapy for Child Anxiety and Child OCD near the following Silicon Valley/San Jose communities:

San Jose Therapy Counseling • Saratoga Therapy Counseling • Los Gatos Therapy Counseling • Monte Sereno Therapy Counseling • Cupertino Therapy Counseling • Campbell Therapy Counseling • Mountain View Therapy Counseling • Los Altos Therapy Counseling • Sunnyvale Therapy Counseling • Santa Clara Therapy Counseling

Cognitive Behavior Therapy Center of Sacramento Valley offers evidence-based therapy for Child Anxiety and Child OCD near the following Sacramento Valley and Sierra communities:

Sacramento Therapy Counseling • Roseville Therapy Counseling • Rocklin Therapy Counseling • Granite Bay Therapy Counseling • Lincoln Therapy Counseling • Folsom Therapy Counseling • Citrus Heights Therapy Counseling •  El Dorado Hills Therapy Counseling • Loomis Therapy Counseling • Grass Valley Therapy Counseling  • Auburn Therapy Counseling

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